“NATURE-NURTURE EQUATION” – in PARENTING

 

Parenting is always related to two aspects of both Nature and Nurture. The “nature” part of the equation refers to the basic temperament the child is born with, i.e., the personality characteristic of the child. According to the psychologist’s Alexander Thomas and Stella Chess described (1950) the following 3 types of personality children are born with:

 

1. The difficult or spirited child: the child who doesn’t adapt well to new situations and who tends to have a negative attitude much of the time.
2. The slow-to-warm-up child: the child who is very cautious and shy when faced with new

situations who are slow to warm up to new people.

3. The easy child: the child who is upbeat, adaptable and mild to moderate in intensity and

Response.

 

EMBRACING PARENTHOOD – SOME ASPECTS OF PARENTING

 

Considering the personality typeps of the children and other theories of developmental psychology which parents refer to or follow these days, parents initially may decide on basics, for instance, values which mean the most to them, such as empathy, affection, conscience, self-control, respect, kindness,tolerance, and fairness. Few other aspects which can be taken into consideration for the preparation of parenthood are as follows:

 

1. Emotional Literacy: It is highly important to teach children how to recognize and be able to read others’ emotions. This can be done by talking about the characters and interacting “feelings” with each other, eliciting important points from the side of children as well.

 

1. Become updated: Parents may take a new look at the current affairs or aspects that might be related to children’s knowledge at appropriate ages. This may include travelling, knowledge, games, business-related news, self-care tips, and other information related to daily life-living.

 

iii. Check out for children’s choice of entertainment: In addition to watching certain political

channels, sexist, racist, and violent content on social media, parents may lookout for materials or content that promotes values that are incompatible with their own; therefore parents can make use of substitutes that help in distracting children from watching illegal content but as well important to let them know or teach the crimes at their appropriate age.

 

1. Setting high moral standards: While children express any negative sort of behaviour, parents can help children mould their thoughts in a respectful way in which they set certain moral standards that children can follow.

 

1. Appreciation: Appreciation is very much important in any relationship. During the time of

parenthood and disciplining the child, appreciation is something that children also learn and use to the world around them. For the children to “learn to appreciate”, parents initially have to acknowledge and consider even the smallest effort children put in wherein they learn to grow in disciplining themselves.

 

1. Accepting “it’s okay” and moving on: We are all imperfect. All our five fingers are not the same.Thus, when parents fail at some aspect in their child’s development to improve, parents may learn to accept and find ways to improve themselves and help their children in their areas of struggles accordingly and understand the fact that every child is unique.

 

vii. Promoting healthy communication: It does take a lot of time to build healthy communication in our homes. Encouraging healthy communication is never a piece of cake unless it involves parents’ investment in time and effort. Whenever the children are talking endlessly it is highly important for parents to pay attention to them, suppose parents are in a meeting, they may kindly or lovingly convey the matter to the children in a way that they understand to respect their parents’ time. Communication says it all.

 

Following are some of the aspects that have failed the communication between parents and

their children:

 

1. Interrupting the child when he or she is opening up.
2. Jumping to conclusions before even arriving at the facts.
3. Failing to comprehend.
4. Not paying attention to the child.
5. Showing dislike about what the child is saying and going down on them.
6. Failing to see the huge deal of what the child is opening up about because it seems

completely insignificant to the parents.

1. Questioning children a lot that makes them reminisce.
2. The past events that might have disturbed them, parents are advised to “let go”.
3. Offering constant advice is another aspect because it can literally “bore” the child or

have them disobey you, rather parents can find “smart ways” to get their children obey

or merely take suggestions or help from parents for their matters.

1. Giving classes or lecturing children is something that is a lot of information to the child,

some of it might be insignificant to them too, rather parents at this point may put the

point through straight away by being polite or “sweet” to their children and enlighten them regarding the “material” that is related to them or age-appropriate rather than

offering lectures.

 

HEALTHY COMMUNICATION KEY FOR EFFECTIVE PARENTING

 

Healthy communication, enculturating values in children, learning from the mistakes and taking actions to improve both for parents and their children, coping with abnormal behaviours of the children, being in support with the children, especially mentally which can develop empathy thereby leading to having a secure attachment and or develop feelings of affection, nurturing and nurturing both parents and children all sum up “Preparing for parenthood”. Often parents have reported about other challenges being faced in the journey of becoming parents such as sleep deprivation, finding proper medications for seizures, constant household chaos caused by a child’s hyperactivity, and especially toilet training. Therefore, essential counselling for parenthood, psychoeducation, acquiring basic training in developmental psychology, and seeking help from other medical supports all can be of great benefit for the preparation of parenthood.

 

Parenting always brings many new happiness and challenges in life. So professional help is always needed in assistance for new parents. We DECSA  offers one of the best psychologists in calicut. We are providing a host of services in mental health and psychology.  To recover mental health with the help of expert psychologists, clinical psychologists, and psychology professionals. Family Counselling, Psychotherapy Psychological problems like learning disorders, which the Decsa clinic assists you in resolving. Decsa clinic has provided some of the best psychologists in Calicut.https://www.decsaclinic.com.